Grieving While Sorting: Why Decluttering After Death is One of the Hardest Jobs You'll Ever Face
- Wendy Barkhouse
- Oct 24
- 1 min read
They don't tell you that grief is heavy - and so are the boxes. The dresser, the basement, the garage ... it all becomes a battlefield between love and loss. And when you're asked to clean it up, you're not just sorting objects. You're navigating heartbreak.
Every item has a voice.
The sweater that still smells like them
The unopened birthday cards
The old high school trophies that felt silly, but now feel sacred
You hesitate. You cry. You save things you never meant to keep, and throw things out you later regret. This is grief in action.
Many families think, "We'll get to it later". But weeks become months, and the emotional weight never truly leaves.
You feel guilt for not "doing it sooner"
You dread going back into the home
You argue over what to do next
You wonder how to honour them when everything feels impossible
I've been there. I know the ache. And I also know the peace that comes from support - someone who can gently guide you through the mess, without judgment, without pressure. Just love, clarity, and calm.
If you're grieving and overwhelmed, I offer compassionate, heart-led support. Let's do this together.
